Is it still okay to post on a blog called "Japanese things" when I don't live in Japan anymore?

Dear Japan,

I will miss you dearly. Though I'm choosing to leave now, I have no regrets about living on your island for a year. I love your people. I love your culture. I have learned so much here. I hope I will be forever changed for the better because of our time together. You are a beautiful place with rich culture and wonderful people.

Keep it real.

Jennifer

high school cheerleaders - Japan style

I found this little gem of a video that I have yet to share. It's the cheering squad from Moka Boys High School.

Watch it to the end because the last move is hands down the best. Enjoy.

today is my first day back in japan and i attempted to go for a run. i failed. but i did see a lizard with a black body and a neon blue tail.

Great things in Japan

Japan lets you rent music CDs. Today I rented 2 CDs for 330 yen (about $3.50). Now it is perfectly legal for me to upload the songs onto my computer and iPod. How and why is it legal? I don't know. But it is, and I like it. :-)

Also, today was my first time to use a music rental store. I chose Tsutaya because it's close to my work, and I've been there with friends before. I ran into two of my students on the way there, and they volunteered to help me get a membership card, even though their English is less than my Japanese. What amazing girls. They marched up to the counter with me and took charge - filling out all my forms and answering all of the clerks questions. It warmed my heart. While at Tsutaya, I saw 18 of my students. Wow. Renting CDs is popular.

4th grade, class 3

So I teach elementary ("sho gakko") every Friday. I don't really like it. It has so much potential to be awkward because, unlike at "chu gakko" (middle school, where I normally work), there are no English teachers on staff, so no one is available to translate for me. The language barrier limits communication not only between me and the elementary school teachers, but also the students. It has the potential to be quite stressful because I thrive in places of good communication.

But one class has really done a remarkable job making me enjoy teaching them.

At Moka Nishi Sho Gakko, there are over 1,000 students. I teach one 4th grade class each visit, and there are 6 4th grade classes. Today I taught grade 4 class 3 ("yon no san kumi" or ４の３) for the second time, and they really made my day. So I want to recognize them in my blog (as if that is some sort of special award...).

The week after my first lesson with ４の３, two students found me in the teachers office and presented me with a book made of thank you letters composed by the class. Each student had written me a full page letter thanking me for teaching them English. Is this for real? I wanted to cry tears of joy. How wonderful.

Today I taught them again, and then returned to their classroom to eat school lunch with them. When I entered the classroom they gave me a standing ovation and directed me to a chair at the front of the room. Then they all lined up in the back of the classroom and performed a song for me. They sang for me! What an amazing class. Then we ate lunch together and played "shiritori," a Japanese word game. It was great.

Thank you ４の３！

giant Asian hornet

Today a "suzumebachi" flew into the classroom where I was teaching.  All classrooms have a wall of screenless windows that are always open when it's warm. Today a visitor entered through said windows. The students quickly alerted us, and told us to turn off the lights because "Saito-sensei said so." We followed the orders, and the predator flew toward the window. However, it flew into the closed window. But brave little Ms. Tanaka used her quick wit to open and then close the windows in such a way as to get the monster on the outside. Bravo. We applauded.

What is this terrible creature you ask? A "giant Asian hornet." And Japanese people are terrified of them. So today I looked 'em up. THEY'RE TERRIFYING. Japanese people are right on about this!

Suzumebachi translates to "sparrow bee," because they can grow as big as sparrows! They're bodies avg. 2 inches long with a 3 inch wingspan and 1/4 inch stinger. The venom contains at least 8 toxic chemicals, and they can be lethal, even to those who aren't allergic to bees. Between 20 to 40 people die from suzumebachi stings in Japan each year. One of the chemicals in the venom actually releases a scent that attracts more giant Asian hornets! 怖い！

Dream about this tonight: 

Sports Festival!

Yesterday was Sports Festival at Moka Nishi Junior High School, my wonderful place of employment. This can best be compared to a Field Day at a school in the US. The kids perform a bunch of random "athletic" events, and parents and friends come to watch. It was a lot of fun. I got to run in a relay race with a 1st year homeroom class (think US 7th grade). I was really excited, and the kids were happy to have me because it was me or a 60 year teacher ... I guess I appear a little more fit...

Anyhow - things were off to a great start in the relay. Each 1st year homeroom had every student plus 2 teachers run in the relay. I was on white team, 11th runner. Things started off fantastically, great baton pass, and I was sprinting - running my little heart out. Students were shouting in amazement at how fast I was (no joke). At the end of my 40 meters, I put the baton in my left hand to pass it to the right hand of the next runner, a 1st year boy. As I hand him the baton...

he trips and falls on his face. 

No joke.

Everyone thinks I ran him over.

Great.

I love being a giant and getting blamed for accidents I don't cause simply because I'm bigger than everyone in Japan.

Sweet deal. 

Anyway, we lost the relay race.

No one was actually upset with me at all. In fact, throughout the day, people continued to compliment me for how fast I ran. Ms. Tanaka, the head English teacher and also the homeroom teacher for the class I ran with, told me not to worry and reassured me that her class was not good at PE, so even if the student had received the baton correctly, they still would have lost.

     In other Sports Festival news, all of the boys did this really

cool performance that involved various human pyramids to the beat of a giant drum. I enjoyed it. I couldn't imagine 

an entire male student body at a junior high school in the US performing such a task. 

Also, they had this event called "Rawhide" 

where students had to form a "horse" and "cowboy" and use a "lasso" to knock a can off a desk. It was interesting. Enjoy the pictures.

homesickness

Currently I'm homesick. Not the kind of homesick that is paralyzing or debilitating; not the kind of homesick that makes you resent your existence away from "home." This is the kind that fills you with love, hope and joy when you think about what you're going home to. This is the kind that makes you smile involuntarily when you think about the faces you will see and the bodies you'll embrace in long awaited hugs in 53 days. This is the good kind of homesickness. It's the kind that reminds you of how much you are loved and how much you love others. It reminds you of the joy you feel in the presence of friends and family who support you. It reminds you of the redeeming qualities of home you quickly forget when you hunger for an adventure. It reminds you that you can love and be loved, feel peace, and enjoy life no matter where you are living.

This is the kind of homesickness I'm happy I'm able to feel.

big dreams

It's official - I love school.

I've started thinking about grad school.

For a long time grad school was something that I would love to do, but it seemed just outside my reach. Today I started researching the top ranked grad schools for education. Yay! It's exciting just to begin looking up these things. I love education. What a big nerd, right?

But I don't care. I want to go to grad school. Perhaps I will take the GRE in Japan next fall... But currently, I will just take it one step at a time. Now is the time for getting a better idea of what and where I want to study.

too cool

Sometimes I think my life is too cool for me. I'm not sure I can keep up.

Today I went for a walk, gave directions to a beautiful Peruvian man who was lost, and ended up going to Muay Thai kickboxing with him and his 4 year old son. Then, after kickboxing, his son wanted ice cream, so we went to 7-11, and, as I was holding the little boy so he could see into the ice cream freezer, one of my Japanese co-workers walked into the 7-11. Here's me, in sweaty gym clothes with a gorgeous Peruvian man, holding a 4 year old child. Start the rumors now. Maybe I should've showed him my bruised knuckles as well, just to make sure the stories are juicy.

Aside from the terrible reputation I will have at my work now, how cool is it to go to an actual kickboxing gym in Japan? They said I can come back and practice with them whenever I want, despite the fact that they're training for actual matches, and I never actually want to hit anyone.

... and I really do have bruised knuckles.

Japanese culture

I'm learning to love Japanese culture.

Most recently the Hana-Yori-Dango tv series and it's two main actors, Matsumoto Jun and Oguri Shun.

And the Japanese comedian Hannya (はんにゃ). He does an act called "Zu-ku-dan Zun Bun Gun Game." I had no idea what this was, and one of my students tried to make me play it at tennis practice after school one day. I was incredibly confused, but also very entertained. Then I found this online and it became even more amusing. I hope you like it!

funny happenings

Once upon a time I got confused about which train ticket to use in order exit the station, and I had to ask the station attendant for help - only I couldn't speak Japanese. He turned out to be incredibly kind and handsome, and even though I couldn't explain myself or what I needed help with, his smile made me feel at ease. He couldn't explain what I needed to do in English, so he just smiled and let me go without paying. When I met my friends for coffee just outside the station, I told them about my wonderful encounter and joked about how this man should be my Japanese boyfriend. My friends and I let ourselves get slightly carried away, and the crazy ideas started flowing. Soon enough, I was being cheered on as I slipped a note with my email address under the glass at the ticket window of the train station like any 15 year old girl and her friends would do. That was three weeks ago.

That night, Prince Charming wrote me an email. We exchanged emails periodically, but nothing serious and no developments. He lives two hours away. I don't really remember what he looks like, and I probably couldn't pick him out in a crowd. I had no expectations for future developments, it was just a wonderful change of pace to have someone smile and comfort me despite my inability to speak the language of the country in which I live. Giving your email address to a stranger is completely UNjapanese and I can't imagine a Japanese person actually participating in such folly.

Today I received an email from Prince Charming saying that last night he met two of my friends at the train station and made a promise that he will see me again.

What?

My life is funny.

おもしろい、ね。

Some Japanese things I like.

Today I'd like to share somethings I currently enjoy about Japan.

First, hanami, parties under the cherry blossoms. It's really a magnificent experience.

Next, two Japanese dramas I have watched online with English subtitles: GTO and Gokusen. Both are about teachers who are fresh and naive in the teaching field but, because of this, are able to whole-heartedly trust and support their students, without the cynicism and pessimism that develop after years on the job.

Now I will openly admit that I fall for every gimmick the media has. I'm a sucker for it all. I'm Hollywood's prime target and, apparently, Tokyo's, too. Because I am aware of my weakness, I've pretty much ceased to watch TV... with the exception of these two dramas because somehow I have convinced myself I'm learning Japanese by watching them. That is my disclaimer. Please note that these shows are far-fetched and unrealistic. 

It doesn't stop them from giving me warm fuzzies at the end of each episode. :-)

Finally, from watching Gokusen, I fell in love with the character Sawada Shin. Yes, I realize he is a fictional J-Drama high school student character. Nonetheless, I like him. In real life his name is Matsumoto Jun, and he's three years older than me, so you don't need to worry about me robbing the cradle or anything. He is also in a J-Pop band called Arashi. After I watched all of the episodes of Gokusen season 1 and the special epilogue, I still wanted more of his precious little face, so I looked up Arashi. Here is one of their hit singles. It's charming and cheesy; delightfully tacky. It warms my heart, while simultaneously tickling my gag reflex and making me roll my eyes.

Please enjoy.

The flowers I saw before were plum blossoms. These are cherry blossoms.

 And I drank a Singapore Sling at the Long Bar in the Raffles Hotel in Singapore.

I have a restaurant that knows my name and order. In Japan. :-)

A (national holi)day in the life

We didn't have school today. It rained all morning, but I was able to get out in the afternoon. I got on my bike and headed towards the park by the river. When I arrived at the river, I was pleasantly surprised to find that the path was freshly decorated pink paper lanterns. (illustration A)

This made me happy. The sight of two men sitting on a bench enjoying lunch in the park made me happier (so much so that when they whistled at me, it went almost completely unnoticed. The only thought it evoked was, "Hm, they must be Brazilian." Japanese men don't whistle at women, and Brazilians are the largest minority population in Moka.) As I rode my bike along the path, I tried to determine the spot from which my camera could best capture the scene. I finally chose a spot, stopping just after I passed two little old Japanese ladies chatting. While I snapped a few pictures, their conversation drew to a close, sending one little oba-san in my direction. Much to my delight, she not only acknowledged my existence, she greeted me and lingered a little, giving me an opportunity to strike up conversation, which I quickly seized in my best Japanese (read "complete butchering of the language"). I pointed to the lantern and said precisely "This, what?" She explained to me that the lanterns were hung for "hanami," the cherry blossom viewing party that would begin as soon as the flowers sprang forth from their buds. She estimated it would be in about 6 days. She told me that the lanterns all represented different business and organizations in the community, and that when the flowers began to bloom and the festival kicked off, there would be food stalls in the park, as well. She said all of this in Japanese. :-). Then she asked a few questions about me, where I'm from, what I do in Moka, if I'm married. When I answered no, she said my parents must have cried when I left. I admitted that my parents miss me a great deal, and she encouraged me to press on. Then she smiled, laughed, shook her head at my terrible Japanese, and continued on her walk. It was beautiful. I continued on my bike ride, which lead to crossing her path once more, and she smiled and said "Ja ne! Bye bye!"

Then I rode my bike to the shrine, hoping to find more pretty lanterns. I did not find lanterns, but I did find beautiful flowers. In my limited knowledge, I ascertain that they are cherry blossoms. However, this is my "hajimete" (first time) hanami experience. So maybe they're plum blossoms, who knows? Either way, the photos are quite nice. (exhibit B)

I must admit that until today, I really couldn't grasp what could be so wonderful about cherry blossoms that every town in Japan would have a "flower viewing festival" each year, where people put on their very expensive, traditional Japanese attire and walk along lantern-lit paths, surrounded by thousands of other people doing the exact same thing.  I mean really? They're just flowers.

But I must also admit that today, as I walked under one of the trees, on a carpet of fallen pedals, and the wind blew just right causing a few more pedals to fall around me, there was something magical about it. And, as I said before, for all I know, these were just plum blossoms, and the cherry blossoms will be even more majestic.

The shrine is a really peaceful place. Sometimes I feel like maybe it should feel oppressive or uninviting to visit a shrine, but there was not even a trace of this at the Moka shrine today. I could have stayed for hours admiring the flowers, enjoying the weather, and taking in the peacefulness, but I was a little apprehensive about the clouds rolling in. So I continued on.

I took a little path I saw near the entrance of the shrine, and, man, did I find some interesting things. First, there were the pretty things. (See images below)

Just after crossing the train tracks, I noticed a fenced in area with a few people walking  around, looking around, almost like they observing some sort of exhibit. Two of the people walked up to the fence, smiling from ear to ear, and said hello to me, in English. It was incredibly un-Japanese. It made me feel like I was the thing on display. It confused me, but I liked it. I always like friendly strangers.

I ended up taking a path that circled around this strange park, and was startled to turn a corner and see a donkey, an ostrich, and an entire rabbit farm. Just beyond these, I saw signs for a squirrel farm. Adding to the oddness, for the entirety of my park-circling, there was this music box-esque melody coming from speakers that I couldn't see. It was really strange. I felt like I was in a horror movie. I didn't stick around.

On my bike ride home, I decided to stop at Fukudaya, the upscale everything store that has the best selection of produce and a bakery. 

As I park my bike in front of the store, I hear someone call out my name. I look up to see about 6 of my 1st year students sitting in McDonalds directly across from me. Two more are running up to me, and they invite me inside.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel a secret sense of victory when the surrounding Japanese people, who usually despise me for existing on their island or stare straight through me, were forced to acknowledge that their own kind desire to be in my presence, so much so that they will come running up to me to invite me inside.

The other side of the coin is that all but one of my girls were wearing their school warm ups, AND loads of makeup. Junior high school students aren't allowed to wear makeup, but here they are, wearing it with their school uniforms, loud and proud. Here are my girls:

I sat and chatted with them for a little, relying mostly on the one Peruvian girl, who typically speaks to me in Spanish, to translate. 

Then I continued on to Fukudaya, where I discovered that I did not really want to pay twice as much for the things I could buy across the street for half the price. So I bought only the things I couldn't get at the cheaper store.

As I walked over to the cheaper grocery store, I passed the tiny little Thai store, where the first stranger in Moka to ever talk to me works. I said hello to him, and we chatted for a few minutes. I told him, in my still terrible Japanese, that my parents are coming to Japan soon, and we talked about that for awhile. It was an awkward conversation. I was grasping for any Japanese words I knew, but he is a kind man, and he held up the conversation, until finally I felt like more of a burden than a conversationalist.

I went on to the cheap store, and fell pray to the onigiri, a very important part of Japanese life. These delicious treats are essentially rice balls stuffed with various fillings and wrapped in seaweed. And they're surprisingly delicious. The problem I sometimes run into is that I can't read the Japanese writing that tells me what will be inside. So today, I bought three, completely clueless as to what I might find inside. It was an adventure. Then I headed home to eat my three tasty treats. However, my eyes were bigger than my stomach, and I was full after one. The one I chose was filled with a sweet soy-flavored substance that was most likely a type of seaweed. Admittedly, when I caught my first glimpse of the filling, I was alarmed, but, as it turns out, it was scrumptious. Take a look. 

The remaining onigiri will be enjoyed at a later time. Yum!

And that, my friends, is a national holiday in the life of yours truly.

Cheers.

Spring!

An update:

Spring is breaking through, and warm weather brings hope. I want to play outside all the time. I enrolled in a dance class on Thursday nights. Two weekends ago Meghan and I found a Japanese church we like (read more about Meghan's thoughts on it here). My parents are coming in 11 days. There are only 3 school days left in the Japanese academic year. 

All of these things bring hope.

I can't wait to see my parents.

Spring means more daylight, more time outside and more fun activities. It also means cherry blossoms. These are all good things.

Out of habit, I turn my emotions off when things get hard. I'm so good at it that I don't even recognize I've done it. For the first 19 years of my life, I didn't even know I had this habit. It comes naturally, subconsciously. It's a such a smooth transition that I rarely know when or why I've done it. I don't even get a chance to identify the emotions I'm shutting off, and I can't ever recall when I shut them off. It's that quick and easy. Today, I realized I was numb. 

Last night, I began reading a book with characters that felt raw emotions. The emotions were extreme sadness, loneliness and depression, and I was drawn to them.I couldn't put the book down. Today, when I woke up, I finished the book. It was all I could do; it was all I could think about. I had to keep reading because I couldn't feel on my own, but I could read about the raw emotions of the characters and it was stirring something in me. I finished the book, and it sent me into a frenzy - literally. I wasn't ready to be done almost feeling these things. They were so close to the surface, but they had not yet surfaced. I could not yet consciously identify these feelings in me, but there were no more pages to read that would bridge the gap. So I did what the character in the book does. She runs. I went running. I ran until my body hurt. I ran to parts of Moka I've never seen. I didn't know where I was going. I didn't care. I just needed to run until I cracked, until I laughed or burst into tears or collapsed from frustration. I needed to feel something, anything, and I thought running to the point of exhaustion could make that happen. I ran up hills. I ran down hills. I sprinted. 

Nothing.

Just a sore body.

So here I am, aware that I am numb and unsure of how to feel once more, aware that the emotions I will feel will be difficult and painful - loneliness, isolation, longing, a sense of uselessness. They will hurt. But they will be real and they are a part of life. It will be better than this. Please, God, may I feel them soon.

I'm famous!

I made it into the slide show at the "farewell party" for the third year students. I win.

and then we went to Kingdom Hall to hang out with the J.W's

Most of you know I've been church hunting here in Moka. 

Yesterday:

I checked out a Catholic church that one of my students told me about. She said it was a Spanish-speaking church, which got my hopes up. Joe took me to find it. When we arrived, no one was there, and all the signs were in Portuguese. Boo. So we got back in the car, and as we were pulling away, we saw three Spanish-speaking women. Joe stops the car and says, "Go talk to them! Ask them about the church!" So, after a minor hesitation, I do.

Turns out, the church is most likely Portuguese only. BUT Sara, one of the ladies, invited me to go to her church - an "English-speaking, evangelical church."

Today:

Side note:  two Jehova's Witnesses came to our door. I answered the door and boldface lied to them when they asked me if I had their "Bible study booklet." Two other Jehova Witnesses visited us a couple months ago and gave us some other printed materials, so I said they had given me said book and kindly ended our conversation.

At 2 this afternoon, Meghan and I met Sara, and walked with her to her house. She invited us inside while we waited for her sister to come pick us up. Her sister came, along with her brother, and a few other family members. We divided up between two cars - Meghan and I with Sara's brother and nephew. On our drive, we chatted it up in Spanish. Miguel, Sara's brother, is from Peru but has lived in Moka for 18 years. He was really kind. As we continued driving, farther and farther from Moka, I asked Miguel how he heard about this particular church, thinking to myself, "this is a long way from Moka, too far to simply stumble upon..." Miguel told me people from the church had come to talk to him, and then he started going to their church. #$%*. That was how I responded in my head. I knew exactly what it meant, and I didn't have the courage to ask what denomination the church was, I already knew.

We drove on and finally, I asked Miguel the denomination, just in case Meghan hadn't drawn the same conclusion I had. The answer "Salon del Reino, Testigos de Jehova." Boo.

So, we went to Kingdom Hall with the Spanish-speaking J.W's today. So much for an "English-speaking Evangelical" church. Maybe this is my punishment for lying to the JW's that came to my door. Jesus didn't condone lying, no matter what the subject. Oops.

Regardless, we had wonderful conversations with Miguel in the hour long car rides to and from Kingdom Hall. I'll be thankful for those. :-)

green tea onsen

when I came back from Thailand, I  brought "omiyage" for my coworkers because that's the japanese way. the Thai omiyage I presented were little keychains with wooden Thai people dolls. the head English teacher, ms. tanaka, sits next to me in the teacher's office and keeps her little Thai person on her desk, atop her computer tower. just behind the Thai person she keeps a  little desktop calendar. now the scene is set.

today, while placing my laptop on my desk, I nudged the corner of ms. tanaka's little calendar, causing it to fall over. it nudged the little Thai person, causing it to fall over, off the edge of the computer tower, for a perfect dismount and a 10.0 landing... in ms. tanaka's cup of green tea. perfect.

i proceeded to gasp loudly and jump to my feet, causing my coworkers to call out in unison "daijobu?" (are you okay?). as i fumbled frantically, i reached into the tea cup, pulled out the doll, held it up, and, while motioning toward the Thai person with an awkward grin, said "swimming." 

they laughed.

phew.

i took the doll and ms. tanaka's tea cup to the sink, rinsed off both and returned them to her desk.

ms. tanaka was not at her desk when this occurred so when i saw her later that day, i told her "i gave your Thai person a green tea bath today. it was like an onsen."

she laughed, as well.

yokatta. saved by a desperate attempt at humor.

a note to a friend in Spain.

This is not significant, and it's written in a foreign language. But it made me happy to write it, so maybe it will make someone happy to read it. Enjoy!

こんいちは!! Todavía estoy aquí en Moka.

Tengo mucho interés en el puesto de Acento. Acabo de solicitar. Ahora, solo puedo esperar la decisión. Espero que me elija, pero, sobretodo quiero estar donde el Señor me dirija. ¡Ojala que mi deseo tan fuerte de estar en Sevilla sea un signo de Dios!

Y ahora, algo de Japón. ¡El idioma es imposible! Ya llevo 6 meses aquí y me siento que no puedo decir más que mi nombre. (Watashi no namae wa Jennifer desu.)

Me siento que es una sociedad bien educada pero no es muy amable. Es algo interesante. Es como la gente es amable en apariencia pero no hay nada más profunda. Se dice que es por ser una sociedad muy tímida, y a veces me parece así, pero algunas veces, me parece algo más… No sé. Pero no quiero decir que todas las personas son pocas amistosas, porque tengo unos amigos muy simpáticos y los estudiantes de mi escuela son genial.

Otra cosa – todo es muy formal aquí. Todo tiene que ser bien preparado. No se puede improvisar nada. Como en el trabajo, tenemos horarios para cada cosa que ocurre – y se da pena apartarse del horario.

Y más importante – ¡la comida es muy rica!

¿Cómo está todo de Sevilla? ¡Me encanta oír de mis amigos sevillanos! ¡Gracias por no olvidarme!

Por favor, ora para la gente de Japón porque la gran parte no sé nada de Cristo. ¡Tengo mucho esperanza para este país!

¡Un besito!

progress

i just sent my application for the Semester in Spain Student Ministries Coordinator position. now it's time to pray for the Lord's will to be done.
i have come to a place where i will be excited to spend another year in moka, if that is how my next year should look, because my love for my job, students, and co-workers is an endless source of joy, and not many people can say that about their jobs, so i will count it a blessing.
i am fully aware of these facts: i don't love kousuke (okay that one was obvious), i don't want to love kousuke, i don't want kousuke to love me, and most importantly i want kousuke to love someone who will really love him because he is a wonderful person.

all of these things are signs of progress in my life. praise God.

i'll have one ticket for the next plane to tokyo, please

once upon a time i had an extra ticket to see coldplay in tokyo. the night before the show, i was talking online to a friend in indiana, and i offered him the ticket. a few hours later he was on a plane to tokyo, where he would meet me at the gates of the concert venue about 30 minutes before the show started. fantastic.
he stayed for a few days and we enjoyed japan together.

sushi

I eat a lot of sushi here. I will try to post some photos of my "life as usual" because if I do indeed stay another year, I know these things won't strike me as interesting, and I'll forget to record them for you.

Sushi here is far less complex than sushi in the states. Sushi rolls have one type of fish and perhaps one other ingredient (like onions or lettuce). There aren't caterpillar, volcano or rainbow rolls. There's mostly just fish and rice. I like it, but I won't pretend I don't love the States' version of sushi.

This is one of my third year classes. They are the same age as US freshman. I have three of these classes, and I love them!

Renewal.

Today I made a verbal agreement in the presence of several of my work-related superiors to return to Japan next fall and teach for another year.

In the back of my head, a little voice said, "Except if I get hired for the job I'm applying for in Spain."

It's been a tough couple of days, trying to prepare for this decision. I don't feel like there was a "right" or "wrong" answer, which is hard for me. I don't feel like the God of the Universe willed for me to say either "yes" or "no." So I acknowledged the fears I have about both answers, and decided to say yes. I feel relieved to have simply delivered an answer. My fears are not entirely gone, but hope is much greater than fear. Another year in Japan will not be easy, but either would a year in any other country. Life is tough, but it's beautiful.

power trips

Today I instigated a 3rd year boy getting scolded. He seems to be at that age when hormones speak louder than the filter in his head, and he tends to make inappropriate comments that I usually ignore. Today, I didn't have patience. It was the last period of the day on a Friday (my busiest day of the week), and I was tired. So when he came up to me with a guilty look on his face and made a comment in Japanese that he refused to translate, I grabbed his arm and dragged him into his homeroom, where his homeroom teacher happens to be an English teacher. I prompted him to repeat his comment, and he refused. The teacher tried to pry it out of him, but he wouldn't say a word.

Later the teacher told me that she had finally got him to repeat it.

He was trying to tell me that he wanted to buy me chocolate on Valentine's Day, but he was afraid to tell me in English because he was worried about what I would think of him.

I'm officially a jerk on a power trip.

The end.

the most bizarre day thus far

Today was really weird. So many strange things happened in one day. To start with, this weekend I cut off about 5 inches of my hair and died it brown. It's a bit of a change, especially in the eyes of my Japanese students and co-workers who quite frequently admire my natural blonde hair. Today was my first day at my junior high school with my new hairstyle. I thought, this could go one of two ways: A) Japanese people don't like to single people out (or be singled out) so they may not say anything at all B) They say "Sugoi!" (the Japanese equivalent of wow) and then "Kawaiii (cute). The first teacher I ran into ...

asked if I had gotten my hair straightened...? Interesting. And this was the question of the day. Nevermind the 5 inch difference in length and 5 shade difference in color. My hair was apparently only remarkable in that it was straight. It was neither a Japanese, avoid-undesirable-attention-response nor an acknowledge-the-obvious-change-response. I promise I'm not just being vain or hoping people will notice me. I'm genuinely confused by this reaction.

Continuing on - today is a special day in Japan. On Feb. 3rd, Japanese people throw beans on their front porch and say, "Devil out, good in!" I'm not Japanese, nor are my AET neighbors, so we had no bean-throwing before work, and I ceased to think about this tradition. Until school lunch. Everyday our school lunch is served with white rice that comes in a little silver tin with a lid (except the days we have "western" lunch and get bread). So today, when I saw that school lunch was the smelly fish that I never eat, I reached for my white rice because I knew it would fill my hungry belly, and I wouldn't have to eat the fish. As I took off the lid to my rice, I was startled. The rice inside was a shade of purple! What?! My coworker sitting next to me informed me that it was special food for Feb. 3rd. Lunch also came with a snack-size package of "mame" (ma-meh, beans) with a picture of a person throwing the beans at a fleeing devil. Takano-sensei, my favorite PE teacher who sits across from me, informed me that I need to eat 22 beans today because I am 22 years old. Interesting...

Moving along to cleaning time after lunch. As I'm cleaning in my usual spot, I hear a punk third year (US 9th grade) boy, who speaks little English, singing an obscure song from "Mama, Mia!" in English. What? Why is this 15 year old Japanese class clown who doesn't know English singing "Money, Money, Money!"?

The adventure continues as the whole school moves to the gym for rehearsal of the 2nd grade (US 8th grade) "coming of age ceremony" that will take place tomorrow. Now you all know that this is Japan, so I can't wear my outdoor shoes inside. But did you also know that I can't wear my inside shoes in the gym? I must have a separate pair of "gym shoes" which are not to be worn in any other location. Today, however, they have covered the gym floor with special mats so that inside shoes may now be worn into the gym. Now we're in the gym, wearing our inside shoes, standing on mats that cover the entire gym floor. 

The ceremony rehearsal is very formal. We must clap as the second year students enter (all 105 of them), and take their seats in the front of the gym. Then each class of second graders goes on stage, select students say some Japanese into the microphone, and I have a very vague idea of what they're saying. Something about their goals. As each student approaches the mic, she/he must bow. She/he must bow again when stepping away from the mic. There is a whole lot of bowing happening. Or at least I thought it was a lot. 

The next part of the ceremony involves several teachers being called on stage to make announcements. Luckily, each announcement is about 2 seconds long. The unlucky part is that each time a teacher is called up to stage we are sternly prompted over the microphone to Stand! Bow! Sit! Next teacher called up, repeat. And repeat. And repeat. And repeat. And repeat. And --- I've never bowed so much in my life! I don't even know what I'm bowing for. Sometimes, I'm not even sure if I'm supposed to be bowing. I just know that the voice commanding me to Stand! Bow! Sit! sounds intimidating, and I don't want to disobey! At one point, I jumped and almost made it fully to my feet when I realized that only the students were standing. Who knows how many times this happened without me realizing it...

Okay, so finally, I am done being barked at in Japanese to Stand! Bow! Sit! and the teachers are summoned for a meeting in the front of the gym. The students remain in their seats while the teachers discuss the rehearsal and what needs to be perfected by tomorrow. 

I'm not using the term perfected lightly. The teachers discuss how the students do not have their fingers curled under and their hands are not close enough to their hips while seated. Then they discuss how the Stand! Bow! Sit! routine does not look unified. It does not look like one person. (Really? Gee, who would've guessed that 316 junior high school students don't move entirely in unison?) Also, the students are shuffling their feet too much when they walk in. Additionally, when the students bow as they approach and step away from the mic, they are not standing in a straight line with the next person approaching or leaving the mic. 

Many of these things will be rehearsed later today in homeroom classes and again tomorrow before the actual ceremony. The bowing, however, cannot wait. It must be improved. Now. So the students have to practice Stand! Bow! Sit!-ing in unison. Each time it looks like 316 students instead of one mass body of computer-programmed robots, they must start again. They finally get it right (and how dare they take so long!), and I breathe a sigh of relief, because I think  the rehearsal is over.

Wrong.

Now they must rehearse the school song again because they are not singing loud enough. And if they are wearing hospital masks because they are sick (that's what the Japanese do when they're sick), they must take them off so they can sing louder. (This seems illogical, they are sick. Why would we make them sing loudly? Oh dear, me and my logic are lost in Japan...) So, as the students sing, their homeroom teachers scold them. The resulting sound is 12 angry Japanese people shouting over 316 students singing. At last, the song is loud enough.

Now are we done?

No. Now the students must be lectured about who knows what. I stop trying to pick up key words and piece things together. I don't care what they're doing wrong now. That's when I hear it - a bucket of water splashing down onto the precious gym floor mats. Wait... there are no buckets of water in here. What was that sound? Vomit! And it doesn't stop. It just keeps coming. Somewhere in this gym filled with 316 junior high school students, someone is puking on the floor. Two teachers go running towards the sound and start dragging a second year student towards the door. He has vomit all over his school blazer, and he's still puking. The teachers are literally dragging him out as he continues to vomit, leaving a trail to the door. Luckily, the time it took for me to jump from "bucket of water" to "vomit" in my head was a split-second, so I got as far away from the spectacle as I could! Teacher or not - I don't do vomit. Plus I can play the foreigner card, I'm often deemed incapable of carrying out teacherly tasks, so I take advantage.

Now we must be done. Everything has been rehearsed. Teachers have discussed. Students have been lectured. And the smell of puke is about to start wafting. 

But no. The lecturing is not done. There is more to be said. And it MUST be said here and now. We cannot leave the gym. The students who are sitting with puke at their feet cannot leave. A few teachers who are not directly involved in the present lectures run for toilet paper, and out of the corner of my eye, I catch one of my cute little Japanese English teachers covering her mouth with one hand and wiping up vomit with the other. This is just too bizarre. Why are we still here? What is going on?

FINALLY the 3rd and 1st year students are dismissed. I breathe a sigh of relief (but not too deep because then I would be forced to deeply inhale the smell of barf), but almost choke on it when I realize that the 2nd year students are not being dismissed. (Remember that the student who puked was a second year student, and all second year students are sitting together, which means their chairs are in the vomit.) To top it all off, the students are now being fiercely scolded. It escalates to the point of one teacher grabbing a student by the shirt collar and jerking him to his feet while screaming in his face. 

At this point, I've had enough. Enough of the smell. Enough of the scolding. Enough of the corporal punishment. Enough of the ridiculous rigidness of this entire rehearsal that prioritizes structure and routine over relieving a group of students who have been breathing in vomit-filled air for far too long.

The entire event, this entire day, in fact, is bizarre.

And absurd.

that doesn't look like Japan...

The other day, I had the privilege of virtually meeting some kids a friend was babysitting. Via a Skype video chat, they asked me where I was and I said, "Japan. Want to see it?" Then I held my computer up to the window so the boys could see Japan. The response I got?

"That doesn't look like Japan."

And they're right. Japan looks a lot like any other developed country. There are paved roads, grass lawns, street lights, and chain restaurants. On my bicycle ride to school everyday, I very rarely notice anything that inspires the thought, "Oh yeah, I do live in Japan."

Japan has a reputation for phenomenal technology. Let me tell you that, although my house is great and I want for nothing (thank you Dickens for introducing me to that phrase), there is nothing phenomenal about the appliances in my house. In fact, my bedroom light quite frequently malfunctions, shutting itself off when the switch is indeed in the "on" position. Additionally, of the three burners on my gas stove, not one will ignite itself - all must be lit with a lighter. My Japanese blender works about as well as my hand and a spoon, and manual labor will never reek of burning rubber, while my blender most assuredly will each I turn it on. While I'm on a roll, it should be noted that if my roommate and I decide that between the two of us, we would like to use the microwave and the dryer, our fuse box boycotts us in our electrical hoarding, and we lose power in half the house (once it was the entire house!). So, I feel confident quashing the stereotype about Japanese technology being something great.

...And then, I see it. The little, square, 2cm x 2cm pattern that looks like something requiring those ultra trendy red-lensed 3d goggles. It's included in the nutrition facts label, in a sidebar ad online, or on an information plaque at the aquarium. What is it?

It's a "Magic Eye" puzzle, and if you let your eyes go completely out of focus, a hidden picture is revealed.

Just kidding.

It's a type of barcode designed to be scanned with Japanese cell phones. The phone automatically opens a web browser and takes you to an information page providing all the details about whatever product/company/exhibit you were reading about when you saw the barcode. They even have these magic squares on the McDonalds "food" packaging. One little scan and you can instantly read about the lack of nutrition found in your BicMac. 

This just might be phenomenal technology.

There are other random technologically ingenious concepts that I come across, but they're always so subtle and removed from any and all hype that they generally go under the radar. I will try to be more observant and keep you posted on further finds...

current obsession

I can't get enough. I thought it would wear off. I thought the fascination would fade. But it hasn't. I can't get enough of him. His name is Miyavi, and he's good.

one more thing to add to the adventure - today I received an email letting me know that there is a position open in Seville, Spain with the studied abroad program I went with 3 years ago. I have wanted this position since I learned it existed 3 years ago. Now it is available, and I am qualified. The only drawback - the interview process doesn't begin until March, and I have to decide if I will stay in Japan by Feb. 10th. Yikes!

quick review

Um... where to begin? Since my last post, I've had my passport stamped about 8 times... I traveled South East Asia for 15 days and tasted a little of Thailand, Malaysia and Indonesia. In my travels I was reminded of how much joy kind strangers bring me. The fact that I had to be reminded of this opened my eyes to how much I have missed it during time in Japan, and this was a little alarming...

    Now I'm back in Japan, teaching once again. I still love my students. I like going to work. If I could take my job and drop it into the middle of a country where strangers are nice to me, it would be fantastic. But I can't, which means my life is currently less than fantastic. It's not terrible by any means, and I can find ways to be content here. I can't, however, find ways to ignore how emotionally repressed the Japanese seem to be. I feel like a very important part of what it means to be human is missing in the sea of people that surrounds me. (And I'm learning a little of what it means to be treated like a 2nd class citizen.)

   Which brings me to my next point: On Wednesday, my boss at the Moka city Board of Education informed me (and the other 5 AETs, as well), that our principals and the supervisors at the Board of Education would "strongly" like us to return to teach next fall. So there's that.

   And I still have a Japanese lover.

I think that's my life in a nutshell.

As for what I would like my life to be - 

I long for a church. I met a Spanish-speaking high school student who told me about two Spanish-speaking churches in Moka. I will try to locate one tomorrow so I can attend a service on Sunday. 

I long for community. I have three wonderful friends, but I still feel lonely. I typically see two or three of these friends on Saturday nights, and that is all. That is the extent of my social life outside of the AET bubble.

I hope that finding a niche in a Spanish-speaking church will lead to a warm-hearted, Spanish-speaking community that will welcome me with eye-contact, smiles and warm hearts - all of the things I don't get from Japanese society.

Keep me in your prayers.

Prayers are life-changing, and Jesus is good to me. :-)